What does it look like for an INF type to be in an introverted loop?

August 25, 2019

This blog is a transcribed excerpt from a live Q&A in our Facebook group, hence written in spoken language. To find the original video on YouTube, click here.

 

Beth is asking about what it looks like to be stuck in an introverted loop for an INFJ. So I'll do both of the types, INFJ and INFP. So for an INFP, what it looks what introverted loop for an INFJ is you gather information with your introverted intuition or your driver, your Inner Adult Self process. What happens is you basically keep making connections, you collect information and you keep making connections in your head about what could be happening. And then your your other part of that introverted loop is your introverted thinking, which is your 10 year old Inner Child. And because the 10 year old Inner Child is all about thinking, and your emotions come out of it completely. So, you may start to make decisions based on your thinking instead of what what's good for everyone. So the more empathetic side of things. So how it feels for an INFJ to be in that introverted loop is that you feel like there's a lot of stuff that you've intuited, that has to be done that you have to do, and you have this big list of things that you have to do. And then you just keep doing the things and keep doing things and you can never relax, you just keep trying to get everything done that you have to get done so that you can feel like you can relax. The problem, of course with that is that you'll never run out of things to do so you're always going to have something to do which means that you know you're going to be you're going to be pretty exhausted. So the introverted thinking doesn't allow you to rest and it doesn't have compassion for you. And when that 10 year old introvert that's making those decisions about you and about your life, then you can get exhausted. So it's the introverted loop that generally get makes us exhausted, because there's always the next thing that you have to get done in order for you to be able to relax but the problem is that you never relax. So that's what the introverted loop looks like for an INFJ. 

 

An introverted loop for an INFP looks a little bit different but it's not dissimilar as in its also inward turning. So, it's all about me, and how I relate to anything else. So it's me focused. And the introverted loop for INFP’s is introverted feeling which is authenticity. Combined with the inner 10 year old the introverted sensing, which is all about what's happened in the past and to gauge what happened in the past, that's always going to happen in the future. Remember, the 10 year old Inner Child  for all types is very black and white. So the 10 year old Inner Child feels like they already know an awful lot about how the world works. So they've gathered enough information to think that they know how everything's going to work out. So what happens then is that for the INFP is that they feel that there's something that they're really good at, that's really authentic to them, they know something is really right for them, and then they make connections to try and gather the information that basically proves their own bias about being right about a certain thing. So for example, if you have childhood experiences, you're an INFP you have childhood experiences where you couldn't trust people, you've been possibly abused as a kid. I know, an INFP, who was the only son, and the youngest son in a group of a lot of girls and  strong women who all bullied this boy. He basically learned to be really careful about whom he trusted when it came to females, and women in general in life, it was like this in the past. So it's always going to be like this. And that's what the INFP 10 year old intercept, Introverted Sensing can think that that is true. So if you're an INFP, you're stuck in an introverted loop, what it looks like is that you think you should be doing something or things should be in a certain way. But then you also have this inner 10 year old who says, but things will never change. So it's like you're really stuck where you are, and it's really difficult to move forward. Because you're not collecting information about what's actually happening. you're collecting information about your past experience. 

 

If you’re interested in learning more about Inner Parenting take a look at the 4 People Within course here.

 

Photo credits:

 

Woman lying on bed: Photo by Yuris Alhumaydy on Unsplash

Woman between gray concrete wall: Photo by Alex Iby on Unsplash

 

 

 

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